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2/23/21-Part one
Feb. 23rd, 2021 09:15 am First post! Exciting! Nothing much to say, just what's happened today.
Well, I managed to scare myself while typing up a story. I've found writing Isaac from Paranatural having the same fears really helps at times. The hard part is that for most stories I write them twice, first on paper and then type them up. This is all well and dandy, and helps when I leave out important words, it's not particularly fun when I get to revisit really big fears and such. But there's Isabel and Isaac fluff later, so it gets better. Isabel and Isaac fluff always makes things better. I also have a super secret Kyuranger project I'm working on. I'm really excited about it, and I hope I can actually write it, since sometimes I plan stuff out and then feel like I can't write it. It's gonna be a lot but I'm really excited about it. Totodile over on Discord helped a whole bunch. They are so hecking awesome.
Psych class is so meh. It has the chance to be awesome and fun, especially with the people I have in my class. I love them so much. Then we had to do a Kahoot type thing. I hate them so bloody much. They stress me out to no end, because they're timed and often I would argue with the answers. We also don't particularly learn anything, since we just go over the chapter we've read beforehand. We're also doing this weird thing where a student teaches us about some terms. We've only had it done once before and I found it eh. It was Owen though, and I like him, and it got us chatting about Sudoku, so that was a point. Speaking of I have a sudoku from him to fight with. We'll see what happens with that. Kid keeps getting disconnected and is all staticy. Not gonna be fun. We are talking about Down Syndrome, which is a good thing. There was a video about a golfer and she seemed really happy. Correlation does not mean causation folks. We are now talking about serial killers. She's into true crime, and that's a good thing, but we don't need to learn about them in the short hour we have in class. twins are certainly interesting to learn about, and how similar they can be even when raised apart. Me and a friend are sending snarky comments to each other during class, because it's really not interesting, and it's the best. Snarky snark about the not very good teacher. We're gonna learn more about mental disorders, which is good, because that's what I mind most interesting about Psych. Friends are talking about ethics. So much better than the class. We're talking about a whole bunch of random stuff and it's making me really happy. The small group that's here is such an awesome group. I could talk with them for hours. Ended up talking about D&D which is awesome. We're just ranting and talking about whatever and I love this so much.
We talked so much none of us really had time to get lunch, but I think that was really ok for me. It was nice to talk to them for a while, as if we were in the building. Especially the guy. We had a weird relationship, and it's always good to know that he feels the same way I do. Good sarcasm buddies. And the whole thing happened because both of them wanted to tell me something after class which I must admit made me feels loved. A few minutes into our discussion out teacher in the zoom muted herself and turned off her camera and we all assumed she left. Spoiler alert, she didn't. We were all talking about leaving since we realized how late it was when she unmuted and turned her camera back on and said we talked about interesting stuff. Not that we were talking about anything she would disapprove of, we just didn't realize she was there.
Chemistry always starts with a joke. Today's was What's A Chemist's Favorite Type Of Music? There were two answers, Heavy Metal and Rock 'n Mole. We don't have Homeroom today due to a suicide prevention thing, during which time I am certain I will be typing here a whole bunch. Talking about suicide just makes me cry. I really enjoy my Chemistry teachers though. At least I get to spend more time with them. We're splitting into two groups to have both teachers teaching, which makes sense. I hope I'm in the room that has no clue how to do dimensional analysis, because I don't understand it in the slightest. I shouldn't be that bad at it, it's basically just baking, and yet I can't seem to get it. I thought the breakout room of six people was really small before I remembered we only have fifteenish people in the class. We are a tiny class. Ratios are going to be the death of me. Especially here. dimensional analysis is being explained, and my gosh, why is there so much canceling out? It's like fractions but extended. After learning about them again I change my statement. It's like adding ratios to fractions. I very much do not like the method, though the method I'm doing is probably really complicated. On the brightside I've been getting the right answers lately, so that's good.
I'm sure the counseling department thought it was a nice idea to have them available during the Signs of Suicide Homeroom lesson, except I hate my counselor. There are so many more teachers I would rather talk to than any of them. Heck, this is almost exactly the reason I'm starting up this diary. As a place to talk through stuff that I struggle with or things that would make me cry talking out loud. Instead I'm going to use this time to tell a story. And maybe write a bit about how Isaac attempting suicide would fit with his character and also make me really sad. A few years ago I was talking with a friend, and she mentioned being worried about one of her friends. I didn't even know the kid. She had noticed that her friend was wearing longer sleeves more often, and thought she saw cuts on her arms. I told my friend she could tell a counselor, because better a false alarm than it actually being something. My friend was too scared to go, so I asked if she'd go if I was moral support. She said yes, so that lunch period we went to the counselor and told them. I never did find out what happened to the kid, but my friend never brought it back up, so I'm hopeful that it was a false alarm, or she got the help she needed. That took a lot less time to type than I thought it would because I'm a fast typer. So, Isaac. My child. I love him but he needs some help. In comic he's just so full of self-hatred. It's good to see Isabel slowly opening up to him. He needs people to open up to, and to open up to him. Hopefully we'll see more of that happening, and hopefully he'll find a way to manage his anger. There are two things I could see happening with him, both of which are really sad. He's already tried to leave the club but come back because of Isabel, but I'm scared he's going to leave again after he learns a bunch of stuff because of how he disagrees with it. I'm also scared he might attempt suicide, because he has the anger, he feels he has all the reasons too. So many things could go wrong. And I ended up writing another part of my Triggers series. There's now a story about body image, zombie apocalypses, AND suicide. It's just a bundle of joy.
Well, I managed to scare myself while typing up a story. I've found writing Isaac from Paranatural having the same fears really helps at times. The hard part is that for most stories I write them twice, first on paper and then type them up. This is all well and dandy, and helps when I leave out important words, it's not particularly fun when I get to revisit really big fears and such. But there's Isabel and Isaac fluff later, so it gets better. Isabel and Isaac fluff always makes things better. I also have a super secret Kyuranger project I'm working on. I'm really excited about it, and I hope I can actually write it, since sometimes I plan stuff out and then feel like I can't write it. It's gonna be a lot but I'm really excited about it. Totodile over on Discord helped a whole bunch. They are so hecking awesome.
Psych class is so meh. It has the chance to be awesome and fun, especially with the people I have in my class. I love them so much. Then we had to do a Kahoot type thing. I hate them so bloody much. They stress me out to no end, because they're timed and often I would argue with the answers. We also don't particularly learn anything, since we just go over the chapter we've read beforehand. We're also doing this weird thing where a student teaches us about some terms. We've only had it done once before and I found it eh. It was Owen though, and I like him, and it got us chatting about Sudoku, so that was a point. Speaking of I have a sudoku from him to fight with. We'll see what happens with that. Kid keeps getting disconnected and is all staticy. Not gonna be fun. We are talking about Down Syndrome, which is a good thing. There was a video about a golfer and she seemed really happy. Correlation does not mean causation folks. We are now talking about serial killers. She's into true crime, and that's a good thing, but we don't need to learn about them in the short hour we have in class. twins are certainly interesting to learn about, and how similar they can be even when raised apart. Me and a friend are sending snarky comments to each other during class, because it's really not interesting, and it's the best. Snarky snark about the not very good teacher. We're gonna learn more about mental disorders, which is good, because that's what I mind most interesting about Psych. Friends are talking about ethics. So much better than the class. We're talking about a whole bunch of random stuff and it's making me really happy. The small group that's here is such an awesome group. I could talk with them for hours. Ended up talking about D&D which is awesome. We're just ranting and talking about whatever and I love this so much.
We talked so much none of us really had time to get lunch, but I think that was really ok for me. It was nice to talk to them for a while, as if we were in the building. Especially the guy. We had a weird relationship, and it's always good to know that he feels the same way I do. Good sarcasm buddies. And the whole thing happened because both of them wanted to tell me something after class which I must admit made me feels loved. A few minutes into our discussion out teacher in the zoom muted herself and turned off her camera and we all assumed she left. Spoiler alert, she didn't. We were all talking about leaving since we realized how late it was when she unmuted and turned her camera back on and said we talked about interesting stuff. Not that we were talking about anything she would disapprove of, we just didn't realize she was there.
Chemistry always starts with a joke. Today's was What's A Chemist's Favorite Type Of Music? There were two answers, Heavy Metal and Rock 'n Mole. We don't have Homeroom today due to a suicide prevention thing, during which time I am certain I will be typing here a whole bunch. Talking about suicide just makes me cry. I really enjoy my Chemistry teachers though. At least I get to spend more time with them. We're splitting into two groups to have both teachers teaching, which makes sense. I hope I'm in the room that has no clue how to do dimensional analysis, because I don't understand it in the slightest. I shouldn't be that bad at it, it's basically just baking, and yet I can't seem to get it. I thought the breakout room of six people was really small before I remembered we only have fifteenish people in the class. We are a tiny class. Ratios are going to be the death of me. Especially here. dimensional analysis is being explained, and my gosh, why is there so much canceling out? It's like fractions but extended. After learning about them again I change my statement. It's like adding ratios to fractions. I very much do not like the method, though the method I'm doing is probably really complicated. On the brightside I've been getting the right answers lately, so that's good.
I'm sure the counseling department thought it was a nice idea to have them available during the Signs of Suicide Homeroom lesson, except I hate my counselor. There are so many more teachers I would rather talk to than any of them. Heck, this is almost exactly the reason I'm starting up this diary. As a place to talk through stuff that I struggle with or things that would make me cry talking out loud. Instead I'm going to use this time to tell a story. And maybe write a bit about how Isaac attempting suicide would fit with his character and also make me really sad. A few years ago I was talking with a friend, and she mentioned being worried about one of her friends. I didn't even know the kid. She had noticed that her friend was wearing longer sleeves more often, and thought she saw cuts on her arms. I told my friend she could tell a counselor, because better a false alarm than it actually being something. My friend was too scared to go, so I asked if she'd go if I was moral support. She said yes, so that lunch period we went to the counselor and told them. I never did find out what happened to the kid, but my friend never brought it back up, so I'm hopeful that it was a false alarm, or she got the help she needed. That took a lot less time to type than I thought it would because I'm a fast typer. So, Isaac. My child. I love him but he needs some help. In comic he's just so full of self-hatred. It's good to see Isabel slowly opening up to him. He needs people to open up to, and to open up to him. Hopefully we'll see more of that happening, and hopefully he'll find a way to manage his anger. There are two things I could see happening with him, both of which are really sad. He's already tried to leave the club but come back because of Isabel, but I'm scared he's going to leave again after he learns a bunch of stuff because of how he disagrees with it. I'm also scared he might attempt suicide, because he has the anger, he feels he has all the reasons too. So many things could go wrong. And I ended up writing another part of my Triggers series. There's now a story about body image, zombie apocalypses, AND suicide. It's just a bundle of joy.
